Birth Parent Stories - Gina & Steve

I was 21 and Steve was 25 when, after two months together, we found out that I was pregnant. We both still lived at home with our parents, but Steve and I thought that we could be parents and that everything would work out. We both took on second jobs to prepare for the baby.

Our plans changed. I was in my fifth month of pregnancy when we started talking about adoption. Steve and I spent a lot of time discussing the option and came to the conclusion that maybe adoption would be the best. We both realized that we wanted more for our unborn baby than we could give. We talked to our parents about everything. They had different ideas and mixed feelings, and this didn't make the decision any easier, especially for me.

When I was in my sixth month, I had my best friend call Lutheran Social Service Adoption to get some information. I was too nervous to make the initial call. My best friend put me in contact with a pregnancy counselor who Steve and I started meeting during the seventh month.

Steve and I met Celeste, our pregnancy counselor, almost every week and eventually started looking through the waiting family profiles. We really tried to find a couple that had similar interests as us. It didn't take long and we picked two couples quickly. Then we narrowed the choice to one. Celeste made the arrangements for us to meet the couple. The meeting took place three weeks before my delivery.

Sitting in the little meeting room with the couple was nerve-wracking. They were just as nervous. I don't recall the details of our conversation, but I know that Steve and I fell in love with them right away. Although all of us wanted to get to know each other better, we didn't see them again until they joined us at the hospital to get the baby.

In late October of 1997, I gave birth to a big baby boy. He weighed over 9 pounds and we named him Jake. He was beautiful. Steve and I had no idea how hard it would be to let him go. So, we took advantage of our two days in the hospital and spent as much time with Jake as possible. Not knowing then if we would see him again, we memorized every detail about him.

The adoptive parents arrived with their 5-year-old birth son to pick up Jake. Steve and I didn't spend a lot of time with them because I was an emotional wreck. The adoptive family was put into a different room while they waited for the baby that they had prayed for. The family agreed to send letters and pictures to Steve's mom in the beginning. After the first set, I started getting them, too.

Six years later, Steve's and my relationship with the adoptive parents has progressed. I think that the success of the adoption comes from our honesty and patience with the adoptive parents. Steve and I have left everything up to them and moved forward at their pace.

Six years later, Steve's and my relationship has progressed as well. Many people had their doubts about us. They didn't think that we could stay together after placing Jake. I am happy to report that Steve and I are getting ready to celebrate our three-year wedding anniversary!

Simply said, the adoption that we are involved in is great. We have seen Jake a few times a year since the adoption. He knows that Steve and I are his birthparents, but most importantly, he knows that we love him. And as for the members of Jake's adoptive family, whom we gave the most wonderful gift to and whom we are very thankful for, they know that we love them, too.